please endure..

spinning colour wheel.

bane of my existence.

f*#% apple.

how soon is now?

and have you ever wondered
as you wander aimlessly through my heart,
if this how i pictured this moment?

India: Clusterf@*%

Udaipur, Ahmadabad, Kochi, Trivandrum, Mumbai: Kicked in the face, picked up, sent home.

Green City. Haveli. Doors. Bye Mukesh. Roof Top Perches. Reading. Writing. Euro streets. Octopussy. City Palace. Floating Garden. Temple. Living Museum. Please, no more curry. Winding Roads. Sleeper train. 'Staff Training'. Maze. I still don't get the service. More Corb and Khan. Sarabay House. Indian Institute of Management. Reinvigorated inspiration. Thank you, Nurur. Lattice work. Indian Thali. Real Paan. Hello! Wholesale market. The hunt for saris. Seeds. Candied fennel. 4 mangos, 2 pomegranates and HBO. Jet Airways. My life, on a plane. A decent cup of coffee is more precious than those stones. The day of rest. Table for two, poolside. Puttering around. Arabian Sea. Indian Ocean. Fishing traps. Reflection. 700km river. Church. Golf course. Last roadtrip. The tip of India. Ashram. Wildlife sanctuary. Elephants. Have we joined a cult? It was while we were both huddled in one bed, around the glow of my phone, scared the chanting hare krishnas were coming to get us, I decided we had to get out.. anyway we could. Run to the hills. Kingfisher. Terrifying flight. Out of India, but still in India. Pinnacle of dirt. Re-couping and re-entering some kind of normality. The Causeway. Crawford Market. The Taj - a little creepy. Marine Drive. The Gate of India. Indigo Deli. Harrison. Souk. Poly Esther. Obi. The system works here. Wasabi. Train Station. University. Art Gallery. I want to move in. 3 weeks felt like 3 months. The poetic country I remember has vanished.

the epilogue schtick

oh, I dare you.

wear me down,

strip me, emotionally naked.

maybe it's not in me to give,

cause even when i'm where I want to be,

I'm still trying to get there.

and while I only need a pen to tell you everything I want to say,

I still haven't found the colours to tell the story.

India: Finally got a piece of the pie

Delhi, Agra, Jaipur & Pushkar: I feel like a stupid tourist.

The times, they are a changin'. Stop and go. CNG's. Lost. Found. Red tape. First real bed of the trip. Passssssss out. Shitty movies. Ordering in. They're serious about service, but still don't have a clue. Connaught Place. Bazaar. Essential Rumi. Incredible India. Plans are good sometimes, even though I hate to admit that. Humayan's Tomb. Gandhi Memorial. Jama Masjid. beautiful tents. Tranquility. Back to the hustle. Almost got hustled. Rickshaw art. Red Fort. DINESH!!! Pindi. Muskesh. Basic Hindi lessons. National Museum of Modern Art.. hmmm. Maybe I should've tried to be an artist. Lotus temple. Sunset. Light and sound. An orchestra of horns. Eggs for breakie. A second lesson in love. Indian road tripping. Hindi playlists, with some 50 cent, sure. The musical talents of Mukesh. Pet monkeys that backflip. Peacock fans. Constant tapping. Please, I can't take it. Is there ever a 'bad' price? A philisophical encounter at the Taj, amid sunset. Reminded of why I do what I do. I think we just paid to get violated and abused. Every morning there is less fruit options. The Ghost City really does feel cursed. Scary encounter. Rajasthan. Greenery and mountains. Pink City. Amber Fort. Mosque. Paan. Naan. I think I'm curried out. Dhal. Peas Pulou. Textiles and jewellery. Zee's 26th. Chocolate cake and King Fisher. 2 mangos and a papaya, please. Herbal rubdown with a side of steam. Bollywood flick. Henna. Yes, even henna. Stroll through more temples. 8 bags of chips and no satisfaction. The energy changed. Lake City. Turtles. Camel safari and sleep in the desert.. ugh, yeap! So it's really more of an urban safari? Ha. More books. Nora and Tony. Camels aren't so bad afterall. White tent. Gin Rummy. India's version of Yukor. Mukesh gets wasted. The first time I've been cold in a month. Camel cart. Sometimes plans are bad, and I love to admit that. Moving on.

Bangladesh: Journey to the Mecca

Dhaka: Chaotic, Congested, Culturally rich.

Zia International. 2 am arrival. Fear and excitement. Tauheed Mohammed. Shoddy cab. Dhanmondi. Barkha homestay. Mangos!! Colour explosion. Rickshaw transit. Rickshaw traffic. Staring is just a cultural thing, apparently. No foreigners. I'm an alien. Coffee world. Work begins. We break bread here. Interview conversations. Words to describe architecture in Bangladesh: Adolescent. Biased. Climatic. Elite. Beautification. Different. Comfortable. Ventilated. Weird. Matchboxes. Construction. Limitation. Life. Nobility. Human greatness. Muzhural Islam. City centre is 10km x 20km, and houses 14 million people. Colonial influence. Bangli modernism. Climate guides design here. TKNRK. Nurur Rahman Khan. Is architecture a human right? Shelter implies protection, architecture implies more than necessity. Architecture is a noble deed. Investment in context allows for true creativity. Architecture = art + philosophy. The four masters. Inspiration in multiple faculties. Architects must uphold the nobility of the time, the people and the era. Do you want to be a thinker, or a builder? A lesson in Le Corbusier. Perfection feels dead. Focused defiance. The last thing you want is a style. Ghulshan. There are no places in the world, it's the people you meet. Fine Arts Institute. Memorial. Writers and their opinions. Power outs. The architectural pilgrimage. National Assembly Building. Louis Khan. An example of true mastery. Silence and light. Bridging difference through form.

Japan: Tradition vs Hyper Consumerism

Tokyo: Takeyo Pay Cheque

Heinously expensive cabs. Spotless. Tokyo Prince. Extemely friendly. I could live, here..? Errands. Bend over backwards helpful. Best snack ever. Tokyo Tower. Sumo wrestling. CNN. Zahra arrives. Walk around Roppongi. Catch up. Bite. Look under any viaduct for really cool places. Japanese pubs. Camera cleaning at Fuji world headquarters.. pretty sweet. Electronic market. Arcade games hall. Claw game for food. I want the edamame keychain, damnit. Subway navigation. Imperial Palace. Was that seriously it? Apparently Japanese architecture is pretty bland because everything gets ripped down within a few years or gets destroyed by earthquakes. Montreal John. Ginza. Matsusomething department store. Art Gallery inside. Kimono. Fruits and veggies. Damn good peach and grapes. Sapporo Lion beer hall. Shoe lockers. Perfect lunch. Original pod hotel. Business district. Lucked out lighting. Conrad Hotel. Tokyo Harbour. Stroll home. Exhaustion. Sushi. Bubble gum Kit Kat. Second wave wired. 4:30am wake up call. Tsujiki Fish Market. Fish auction. 500 pound tuna. Best sashimi experience of my life. Nap. Check out. Move hotels. Ueno district. City grit.. finally!! Absolutely no order to the Japanese address system. How do you mail anything here? Massage chair. Call home. Le Corbusier. Contemporary Museum of Western Art. Rodain`s Thinker. Jean DuBuffet. Jackson Pollock. So there are homeless people in Tokyo. Pineapple on a stick. Tiny alleyways. Res-like hostel. Where the heck is that buzzing coming from? University slideshow. Omotesando Boulevard. Todds building. Harajuku Street. Boutiques. Japanese hipsters are cooler, or bigger l0sers, whatever. Vacant Gallery. Amazing music exhibit. Pay, or get out. Fontski in Tokyo. Shinjuku district. Overstimulation. Is this NY or Tokyo? Sushi. Heart to heart. Pink line. Playlist. Passout. Starbucks. Bean pancake. Endless beeping. Areesa!! 45th floor observatory. Shibuya. Designer fruit. $180 mango. Buffet. Sign holders.. flight of the conchords? National Museum of Contemporary Art. Amazing building. Closed for a function (almost talked our way in as Canadian Art Critics.. ha). My hips hurt. Roppongi Hills. Musical toilets. Pedicure. Segoy. Itzukatzu. TORO! Ramin noodles. Arigato. Wunderlust. Inspiration from a 4yr old: find your passion and follow it.

China: Xie Xie

Beijing: Beijing Express

630am airport pick up. Radley Mackenzie. 1st Boys Soccer playback. Tsingtao in hand. Season's Park. Shower. Nescafe Iced Coffee. Unbelievable pollution (apparently living in Beijing is like smoking a pack of cigarettes a day). Tiananmen Square. Communist Party of China. Mao's Moseleum. Forbidden City. Western-style line up. Love tree. Blind scam. GUILE! Kuai. Ho Hai district. Bloody Marys. Bu Yao. Bird's Nest. Water Cube.
Radley's chat with Quincey Jones during the Olympics:
Q - How old are you?
Rad - 24.
Q - I've had hangovers longer than you've been alive.
798 Art District. The Chinese contemporary art I saw was really, really good. Peking Gallery. Surprise visit from Pat Maloney. Ex pats, diplo kids and army brats. Indian Kitchen. Q Bar. Punk. Bottle service. Unexpected events. First sleep in of the trip. Sunday Funday. Love China. Daytime bar hop. Dumplings. Paddy Osheas. Foot massage. Canon. Big eyes. Where did the time go? Blaring music all night. Great Wall.. it really is a GREAT wall. 2 hour hike. Alex. Corn fields. Random restaurant. Leaky nipples. The 'veg' who eats chicken. Car accident. Vehicle almost rolls. Rad manages to not spill a single drop of beer. China pull = 500RMB. Discovery Channel in Asia is hilarious. Quiz night at Danger Dolye's. Patricia's South America tips. Postcards. 1 hour sleep. My liver hurts. Japan.

Cambodia: Parallel Worlds

Siem Reap: An architect's dream

Late arrival. No hostels available. Walked out. Turned right around. Driver Jake. Bankrolling education. Angkor Wat Temple. Blows my effin mind. Scarf 1 dollar. Lady, I remember you. Coconut curry. Coconut juice. Nice to eat vegetables again. Mmmm. Move hostels. Bun Kao not Bun Gao. Old market. Silk, silk, silk. Ivey restaurant. Pub street. Angkor What? Funky Munky. California Chickitas. Heinrick. Yes, I'll have another. Late nights. Early mornings. More temples. Kid ambush. iPhone is the best distraction to show people when they're trying to sell you something. I don't want an ornament, but i'll give you gum. 40 minute hike to.. what was that again? 8 classmate alumni from LA. Hospital between them. Butterflies everywhere. The sprayer fan. Motorcycle rides in the sun. Thai massage, in Cambodia. You okay? Skipping dinner. Bike rides along the river. Siem Reap parks. Cambodian People's Party. 4am wake up. Sunrise down the river. Third day of temples. New market. Cambodian hospitality. Sunset hike. 300 people. Stairway to Heaven. Dairy Queen Blizzzzzzard.. yeah. Empty planes. Bangkok extortion.

Do you see what I see?

Vietnam: Take a closer look and see a country defined by war.

Ho Chi Minh City or Sai Gon: Organized Chaos

District 1. Old Market. Shit hostel. Ai Ling Loh - my savior. Cu Chi Tunnels. Temple. Endless names. Ron Glosson - a southerner in Rhode Island. RISD. Driver Chin. Practicing English. A lesson in love. Dragan and the furniture warehouse. Cheap labour. No chequing system in Vietnam. Pay day. Dinner with the ex-pats. The Larry story. Loveless relationships - makes you appreciate the good people. Pham Ngu Lao (backpacker) district. Crazy Bull Nightclub. 'Greek Salad'. Stupid Chloe dog. Park Hyatt Hotel - nicest place, looked at me like I was a bum. Best coffee. Reunification Palace. War Museum. Train Station. Postcards with glue brush. 4 hour airport delay listening to The Beatles. Lightening clouds over Ho Chi Minh en Route to Cambodia.

Vietnam: Take a closer look for the real thing

Hanoi: Northern Flare

Crazy drivers. 6+ accidents before reaching the hotel. Old Quarter. French Influence. Boulevard streets. Night market. Hoan Kiem Lake. Pennsylvania Peter. 5 people on a motorbike. Street Pho - pho crying out loud it's impossible for a veg to eat here. Weed guys. Miss Moon. Ga Ran Kentucky. Ha Long Bay. Couple from Tasmania inspiring me to live the unconventional life. Hilarious couple from Malaysia - perplexed by me. Lunch cruise. Caves. Beach. Hike to point. Pissing monsoon rainstorm. Driver Doan. Writing him a feeling. Museum of Ethnology. Ho Chi Minh Museum. Silk Village.

On the Road

Three days.
Four Planes.
Half way across the world.

The Eye of the Beholder

Y'know those moments where something you thought was concrete suddenly shifted? It's a funny thing really. It can be triggered by a conversation, a smell, a noise, even an energy in the room. I know when it happens for three reasons:

1) I have a really weird sensation go through my brain. The best way I can describe it is like having someone pour something cold on top of the inside of my head. 

2) I can actually see a fuzz for a split second. Like the room just skipped rotation, or maybe changed directions. 

3) The big "oh yeah" hits.

While these moments don't occur regularly, when they do, most of the time it's because I realize something I previously believed or took for face value is actually complete bullshit. While feeling like an idiot for not seeing what was clearly right in front of me the entire time, I tend to start smiling or laughing. If I happen to be around other people when I have these realizations, they tend to ask me why I'm laughing or smiling for no apparent reason. Sometimes this is fine because whatever I just realized doesn't pertain to them, and maybe they will actually find the entire scenario funny as well. However.. sometimes this happens in a completely inappropriate place, and at a time where I will probably offend the people I am with. Now, when I find myself in this place, I can usually make up some silly white lie, tell a joke, or slough it off on somebody else. Yesterday things were different. 

Last night I was at a work anniversary party. The usual industry suspects were there, one of whom is this older gentleman who always looks mildly the same. You can pin point him from across the room because he has white, white hair, which is always tied back in a ponus (yes, a ponus), wearing a dark suit with the jacket resting on his shoulders like a cloak, and a brightly coloured scarf wrapped around his neck. I guess I should also mention that this attire does not change winter to summer.. apparently the man has no problem with humidity. 

Anyway, I had always been under the impression this man had something to do with the establishment of the Design Exchange. I should clarify, I have always believed this because this is what he has always told me when speaking with him in the past. According to 'Jim' his family has always been deeply involved in the design community in Toronto and when the DX was established he negotiated the space as well as the government support to make it a NFP, registered charity. During these rants, I always thought Jim was kind of egocentric, but had no reason to doubt him. "Ok, sure, great.. yeap, that's fantastic". I just thought he was one of those people who needed other people to know their accomplishments. 

However, last night, while listening to the third or forth variation of this story, something clicked and I realized this guy is actually completely nuts. Not only did he not have anything to do with the establishment of the DX, but I question whether he has anything to do with the design community at all. Certifiable. Naturally, I start to snicker during all of this while still trying to make it seem like I'm completely enthralled with his story. But after about 20 seconds of cold water running over my head, a fuzz in my eyes and one of the biggest "oh yeahs" I've had in a long time, it is becoming blatantly obvious to this guy that I'm laughing and that I'm probably laughing at him. 

Luckily, at that exact moment my boss approached me, probably knowing how crazy this guy actually is, saving me from a potentially very awkward moment. One in which I doubt I could have put together a decent enough escape strategy, and all the while knowing that calling bullshit on someone who probably believes every convoluted word they utter will not end amicably. I don't know what happened to Jim because I didn't see him for the rest of the night, but I do know that even truth is in the eye of the beholder.

Freshly Cut Grass

New beginnings. Changing tides. 

Don't hold on to the bad. Don't hold on to the good.

You crept up out of nowhere and completely surprised me.  

Next Level Shit

I recently embarked on learning and sharing random trivia.

I try to share at least one fun fact everyday.

Who would have known that fun facts were so fun?

Take a bite. Get lost in all that weird shit.

And with this I say goodbye

I wanted to believe everything you said, but deep down I knew it was a lie. 

And, I knew that you didn't know. 

So how could I be mad?

I'm annoyed that you still talk circles around yourself.

You should know better. 

Sin City or Bust

The spectacle of all spectacles. 

The truest sense of Baudrillard's Four Orders of Simulacra, maybe even a fifth. A copy of a copy of a copy of a copy of a copy. 

Trying to be something meaningful and meaningless all at the same time. 

Vegas lived up to every dirty stereotype and association I've ever had or known. Funnily enough, I'm not sure if I'm disappointed or impressed. 

Some things I've learned.

Tell people how much they mean to you. 

Write everything down.

Don't hesitate.

Take lots of pictures.

Don't expect anything.

Follow your instincts.

Have meaningful conversations.

Get comfortable with humility.

A genuine smile can get you almost anywhere.

Food for Thought - Life Creates Conditions Conducive to Life

Janine Benyus' TED Talk. Some inspiration from biology.

So Much To Do, So Little Time.

I am a firm believer in doing things well. Maybe take on a little less at any given time, but really put yourself into those select endeavors. The experience becomes much more rewarding and important that way.  

My appetite to accomplish it all sometimes conflicts with this belief. It requires an intuition of knowing when to do what. Because I do believe that it can all be done. Rather, it's more a question of tackling the appropriate tasks at the appropriate time. Problem solving; which I love. Here are the pieces. Now make it fit. 

Traveling is creeping up on me again. The destinations: South America, the Middle East, Africa and Asia. The variables: graduate school, building my career and attaining some undefined sense of establishment (this probably only makes sense to me). The catch: make it fit before 30. 

I am a planner, but I love the thrill of the unplanned. Life takes organization. Adventure takes the risk of going on a whim. 

Should I Stay or Should I Go?

I am nomadic by nature. I find it difficult to stay in any one place for any length of time. 

This has always led me to great adventures. I have been lucky enough to travel a good portion of the world and I have no intention of stopping anytime soon. In fact, the more traveling I do, the more I want to be on the road. 

Living a quote on quote "normal" life, in one place, working a 9-5 with all the stability and comforts most people work toward, has just never really appealed to me. Unfortunately, acquiring other notables in my life (like an education and a support network) requires a commitment to place. At least in some capacity. Or so I've been told.

For the last year, I have committed myself back in the city I grew up in. The city that I have the widest network and the most resources at my fingers. I am working - the closest thing I think I ever will - to a 9-5, and developing those notables I apparently want. Yet, despite all of this, I feel more disconnected to place than ever. 

My goal then = figuring out how to live a life of adventure + achieve my dreams.

Working backwards helps.